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projecting their feelings towards the image. The emotional climate was so powerful that I
could easily perceive how those feelings elongated in the shape of fibers towards a shadow
which was vibrating behind the sculpture. And I was not the only one who realized the
phenomenon. There was a tourist there who, when he was
'attacked', took a stone and threw it against the statue. I applauded! Those things are centers of
humanity's fixation. They condition the attention, they bind it."
I commented that it seemed pitiful that the most magnificent creations of humans were in fact
vehicles of their fixation.
Carlos replied that I had it backwards. He said that the problem is not in the monuments, or in
the intent that gave them existence, or even in the inorganic entities who use them as traps,
but in ourselves.
"Those works belong to another modality of attention; they have the ability to move the
assemblage point, and that gives a rest to our fixation. But there is nothing more obsessive
than the second attention, and to feed it with unrestrained enthusiasm can put us in a state of
total energetic submission. "However, that doesn't mean you cannot defend against those
places. There are two ways by means of which we can counteract their heavy intent: turning
away from them, or cultivating impeccability.
"A warrior is able to emerge intact from any conceivable situation. When we cut our ties with
our human form, nothing external can affect us any more. Then the monuments of old Mexico
are revealed in all their splendor and, at the same time, they take up position where they really
belong: The place of silent understanding."
8
Validating The Nagual
In the months following our first encounter, my commitment to Carlos stayed on the level of
attending his lectures and reading his books. But it didn't take long before the magic of his
teachings began to attract me with a force of its own.
This situation confronted me with a choice, which I suppose presents itself to every apprentice
of nagualism: On the one hand, I could analyze the strange ideas of sorcerers in the light of
academic knowledge, assimilating only what I could understand and verify. On the other
hand, there was always the possibility of accepting Carlos' words to the letter, provisionally
relegating my prejudices until I could work out a framework of my own, supported by
experience.
When I told him about my dilemma, he was happy and told me the two options I had
considered had one important thing in common: Practice. So it didn't matter which one of
them I would adopt, as long as I was inflexible in my conclusions.
I tried to elicit some explanations from him that might serve as a point of support in my mind
and enable me to accommodate his postulates, but he interrupted me with a gesture:
"A warrior is not ahead of knowledge," he told me. "He doesn't make enquiries out of habit,
nor does he succumb to the sense of not understanding. When he wants to know something,
he experiences it."
I made him notice that the word 'experience' had a very different meaning according to who
pronounced it. For him, it meant a way of facing life; for me, the need to understand a
phenomenon on an intellectual level.
I thought I saw Carlos repressing an ironic smile. In a very kind tone, he explained that the
knowledge and exercises of sorcerers are not by themselves difficult to understand or to
practice. What makes them seem crazy, is the fact that they were designed by a culture alien
to us, and for people with a different understanding of the world. He attributed my initial
distrust to my rational configuration, not to any impediment of energy.
He added that modern science has not been able to penetrate the Tollec knowledge because it
has no appropriate methodology, not because the principles of sorcerers and scientists are
intrinsically incompatible.
"In spite of all their good intentions, researchers are unable to move their assemblage points
on their own. That being the case, how could they understand what sorcerers say?
"The lack of energy is a serious barrier between ordinary man and sorcerers, because, without
the necessary power, corroboration of the phenomena of sorcery is impossible. It is as if two
people are trying to communicate in different languages. In general, sorcerers lose in that kind
of exchange. In other times, people were threatened into believing they would lose their soul
if they listened to the sorcerer; today modern man is indoctrinated to believe that this vision is
unscientific.
"The truth is something else. Practicing the warriors' principles, far from damaging our mental
clarity, gives us valuable tools with which to manage knowledge. That is because these
principles, when they are guided towards accumulating energy, zealously follow two
scientific postulates: Experience, and verification.
"Contrary to what many think, the need to corroborate is not exclusive to Western culture, it is
also an imperative in the Toltec tradition. Nagualism, as an ideological system, is not based
on dogmas, but on the personal experience of generations of practitioners. It. would be absurd
to think that all those people, over thousands of years, have placed their trust in simple lies.
"Since its starting point is experimentation, we can say that nagualism is not a belief system,
but a science."
This statement was too much for me.
Certain topics in Carlos' teaching had an undeniable practical value; for example, his constant
advice to control self-importance, to acquire a clear vision of the privilege of living in this
instant, and to adopt the strategic principles of the warrior's way.
However, other points of his conversations went beyond my capacity to understand. I simply
could not accept that, in a parallel space to this world, a universe of laws that has nothing to
do with our daily logic exists, populated by conscious entities that my senses cannot perceive.
From the expression on my face, Carlos no doubt realized that I
didn't entirely agree with what he had said, because he added:
"For you, to corroborate is to explain, while for sorcerers is to witness indescribable things
without subterfuge or mental tricks. You believe that the reach of your senses is the real limit
of the universe, but you don't stop to think that your senses are very poorly trained.
"I am not inviting you to believe, but to see, and I assure you that seeing is sufficient proof of
everything I have told you. However, I cannot attest the energetic essence of the world for
you; that you have to intend on your own, and to find inside your innate potentialities the way
of carrying it out.
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